The Argument for Dog Ownership

I consider cooking to be a hobby, even though I do it sporadically (well, serious cooking, I make noodles and quinoa a lot, but I’m terrified of cooking meat – hey, hey salmonella!).
I know a few of you have been privy to my burgeoning Pinterest recipe board. I’m working my way through trying the equivalent of one new recipe a week, picking largely from the vast expanse of the internet.

But lo! Let me warn you on the dangers of using the internet to search recipes. This may also speak to my inability as a cook and validate my skills as a baker (of which I truly believe are two separate skillsets).

I’ve been looking for a good recipe for black bean burgers, and ended up settling on one that also included quinoa. I’m not even going to bother linking to it because it’s such a clusterfumble, I don’t even want to give the page hits. Mid-way through making it, though, I realized the recipe skipped a step, had a bizarre flavor profile and didn’t include salt.

They are awful. Like mealy, bland-black-bean-dip-formed-into-hockey-pucks awful. They are covered in panko, but since they went in the oven, they look like coconut flakes.

I thought about actually eating them as burgers, but that though is so unpalatable, that I’m just going to crumble them up on the top of my lunch salads. Which is really going to bring down the whole level of my salads, but it’s better than waste, I suppose.

If only I had a dog…but I’m guessing the black bean gas mixed with dog flatulence would be incendiary.

So, those black bean burgers were a bust, but I’m digging through the following two cookbooks, so I’m bound to find something that works:

Have any no-fail black bean burger recipes I can try?

4 thoughts on “The Argument for Dog Ownership

  1. Baking and cooking – totally different things… but not really. I love both.
    Those black bean burgers sound horrible!
    Oh, I have a couple America’s Test Kitchen cookbooks and honestly, they make things so complicated, I’ve gotten frustrated with the recipes, even though I love to cook.
    So, I didn’t think you were a vegetarian? What’s up with not cooking meat? I have a cutting board I only use for meat and hit it w/ a lil bleach when I wash it. If you want any simple recipes for basic dinners, just let me know. I probably cook a full dinner 5 nights a week!

    • I’m not an actual vegetarian, but I’ve never been comfortable cooking meat (stove top: I can make roasts and pulled pork in the crockpot) because it usually comes out way underdone (fixable), or way overdone (too late). So most of the time, I stick to what I have had a lot of practice in: grains, vegetables, fruits, casseroles, roasts. I love meat, though! Bring on the bacon!

      The America’s Kitchen cookbooks are a testimony to reading and re-reading the directions a couple of times before you do it, which for me, is very handy (I over-prepare everything). But, I am always looking for basic, nutritious recipes that I can do, so I definitely will take you up on your offer to share. :)

  2. Beef stroganoff would be a good start for the stove top. It’s pretty fool-proof and great for cool weather:

    about 1/2 – 1 pound thin beef cut into thin strips (or get them to stir-fry slice for you)
    Toss beef in flour, evenly coat (a lil extra in bottom of bowl won’t hurt)

    2 Tbsp butter melted in a pan with a lid – dump in beef and brown well

    toss in:
    1/2 small can of low-sodium beef broth (add more later if it’s too thick for your taste – the veg will release liquid)
    8oz pack of sliced mushrooms
    1 onion sliced
    2 cloves of mined garlic

    cook veg then add:

    dry or fresh thyme and rosemary and a few bay leaves (can make a sachet w/ a coffee filter & string if you don’t like the rosemary bits – or just cook w/ a sprig and take it out)
    a few heaping spoonfuls of your fave mustard
    a couple heaping spoonfuls of low-fat (or reg) sour cream – mix well
    salt & lots of pepper to taste
    Can simmer on low for forever while you cook mashed potatoes or your fave egg noodles.

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